No One Told Me:
All the things we don't talk about
from postpartum to bringing
the village back

with documentary filmmaker and mother Zulilah Merry

Download on Apple | Download on Spotify | Download on Google Podcasts

Something that always surprises me is how powerful it is to share stories, especially when they relate to "things we don't talk about."

It's pretty easy for us to share stories about how our day went awry, or something funny about what our kids did when trying to get them to eat their dinner. 

But what we don't talk about are often the things we are socialized to keep quiet. 

Which tends to be, oh just about anything related to our pelvis and wombspace, especially when we're feeling vulnerable or like we're the only ones who must be experiencing this [insert very common reproductive or sexual or hormonal health issue here]. 

The reality is that many of us have been socialized to feel shame around anything we experience related to "down there."

And since we only see the happy moments and smiling photos of postpartum parents and families, it's easy to believe no one else is struggling.

But let's be real.  

Especially for first time parents, but also any subsequent birth, there are SO MANY unexpected things that show up.

 
From perineal tears to healing from a cesarean to feeling scared to poop to prolapse to incontinence to massive mood swings to beyond-imaginable-fatigue to being responsible for another human to nipple soreness and figuring our nursing and on and on and on. 

But who talks about this? So much of the focus tends to be on preparing for birth and often very little if any heads-up about what to genuinely expect in those days and weeks after birth, physically, emotionally, mentally, etc.  

This is what Zulilah Merry's documentary film, No One Told Me, vividly portrays in observational form. 

Simple, observational, real-deal postpartum journey. 

Which is both refreshing and a gift to see. 

We talk about her film and her journey to making it, as well as what is profoundly missing in our current individualistic, "I can do it myself," society. 

And how important it is to find ways to connect and build community in this world that is endlessly asking us to stray from it. 

Listen to learn:

• the premise of No One Told Me
• what prompted Zulilah to make this film
• why the style of observational documentary is powerful in the postpartum context
• how sharing honest views into this time of life can support others
• what might be possible if we center connection versus individuation

Resources:

• Sign up for Tending the Loss of Abortion (starts April 7, 2024)
• Episode 25: Immediate postpartum care the herbal way
• Episode 49: Creating a sacred window postpartum and beyond
• Episode 106: How to restore your core and pelvic floor

Connect with Zulilah: 

• Watch her film online: No One Told Me Documentary
  
  

• Check out the upcoming in-person screenings No One Told Me Documentary 
  
  

• Host a screening: No One Told Me
  
  

• Connect on IG: @noonetoldmedocumentary
  
  
  
  

   

DISCLAIMER: This podcast and blog is for educational purposes only, I am not providing any medical advice, I am not a medical practitioner, I’m an herbalist and in the US, there is no path to licensure for herbalists, so my role is as an herbal educator. Please do your own research and consult your healthcare provider for any personal health concerns.

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